Talk
by the psycho sour skittle
Summary: Just one of many Booth and Brennan’s conversations while on their way to a crime scene.


Summary: Just one of many Booth and Brennan's conversations while on their way to a crime scene.

"Booth, turn left."

"Bones, I know where I'm going."

"If you did, you would turn left here."

_Beat._

"You missed it."

"Bones..."

"Okay, sorry."

"Yeah, I'm sure."

"Is it that time of the month?"

"That time…Bones, guys do not _have_ a 'that time of the month', only women do."

"Could've fooled me…"

_Heavy sigh._

"Here's an idea. Let's have silence the rest of the way, 'kay Bones?"

"I'm just trying to have a normal conversation, you know, like a_ normal_ person?"

"You _aren't_ a normal person, Bones!"

"You're awfully snippy this morning."

"Snippy?"

"Yeah, snippy. Did you not get your morning coffee?"

"Yes, I had my coffee, not that I have to answer to you and since when does asking for silence create more conversation?"

_Beat._

"Aw, Bones, c'mon. Don't be like that."

_Beat._

"Why are you ignoring me."

_Beat._

"Booooonnnnes…."

"What?"

"There you go."

"Booth…"

"C'mon, Bones, where's that smile?"

"Your charm smile isn't going to work with me, Booth."

"What charm smile?"

"That one."

"What, this one?"

"Yes. That one."

"No one can resist the charm smile, eh Bones?"

_Beat._

"Aw, c'mon, not again. Look, if I say I'm sorry, will you talk to me again?"

"Fine."

"Great. That's good."

_Lengthy pause._

"Turn here, Booth."

"Bones…we've been over this. I know where we're going!"

"You're acting that way again."

"What way?"

"You're all…huffy."

"Huffy? I do not _get_ huffy. My mother gets huffy. My grandmother gets huffy. _I_ get annoyed. With you."

"Okay."

"I mean, you are very difficult to work with."

"Me? You obviously haven't worked with someone like you. I feel that I have been extraordinarily patient with you, Booth."

"Riiiight. Because I'm the one who uses huge words. You should hand out dictionaries before you start talking because you are the only one who knows what the hell you're saying."

"Sarcasm is not contusive to a healthy work environment, Booth."

"Don't get all squinty on me, Bones."

"I'm not. Do you see a skeleton in front of me? I mean, you're next to me, not in front of me. And I'm not examining you, so therefore I'm not squinting at you."

"Ha. That's a good one, Bones. Only one problem. I'm still alive."

"Did you just roll your eyes at me?"

_Beat_.

"Booth, if you don't take a left here, you're going to miss the last possible exit that will lead us to our destination."

"Bones…guess who's in the driver's seat? Me! Now, guess who's in the passenger's seat. You. There is a reason you are there and I am here."

"Of course. It's simply the alpha-male exerting himself to show off his superior skills to the female in his presence in order to impress her."

"What? No! I'm not…this isn't…I'm not…"

"Relax, Booth. If we ever get to the crime scene, I'll be very impressed with you."

"Thanks, Bones. Thanks a lot."

"You're welcome."

"You don't get sarcasm, do you."

"How can I obtain something that's not tangible? You can't wrap it up and deliver it to me, or place it in my possession, or…"

"Okay, Bones, never mind. It's in one ear and out the other."

"Hey, I know what that means."

"Great. Good for you. You got one."

"See? I'm learning."

"Yes, you are. Good job."

"All you have to do is learn some 'big words'. Then we'll be even."

"Even? Bones, what is this, a 'mine is bigger than yours' contest?"

"I don't know what that means."

"It means…oh never mind."

"Hey, look!"

"What?"

"Don't snap at me, Booth. I'm trying to help."

"What am I looking at?"

"We went too far. We have to turn around."

"What?!"

_Low growl._

"Admit it, Booth."

"No."

"Admit it.

"No."

"Boooooth."

"Fine. You were right."

"Thank-you."

"You know what, let's play the quiet game."

"I don't know what…"

"It means, lets see who can be the quietest from now until we arrive at the crime scene, alright?"

_2 minutes of silence._

"Booth?"

_Sigh._

"Yes, Bones."

"You missed the turn again."


End file.
